Comic Book Joker Gifts

Bat Signal with Blue Ticks

"Couldn't you have just laughed instead of spelling 'LOL' in your alphabet soup?"

Child laughs while making farting sound under arm. Dad says, 'Isn't it nice when they find something they're good at?

"Ooh look Derek. A shooting star. Quick make a wish"

Get crazy once in a while

"Ok... for today I want a 500-word essay on what you know about nothing."

"I wish we were just called T-Rex..."

'Want to freak her out? Stare over her shoulder without blinking for 10 minutes.'

Never pick a fight with a comedian.

Veloci-Rapper

"It's not carrots but the love of carrots that's the root of all evil."

"See how it feels"

'Cows have bells because their horns don't work.'

"Out, damn'd Spot, out I say! Ha Ha Ha Ha!"

'I've heard all about you. Jayne says you're quite the prankster.'

'The most moving part, for me, is when they explain how to fuse the main pipe to the power hose.'

'I'm surprised the boss isn't in here checking up on us!'

'You again? OK, pal... I'm deleting you and this time you're going to stay deleted!' ~ the screen saver of Dorian Gray.

Toilet humour

"He claims to be self aware but he clearly can't read a room."

"What do you mean, you 'feel funny'?"

'Good book?'

Here lies BoBo the Clown

'Let it go, will you? -- That whoopie cushion incident was years ago!'

"He's always been an optimist."

Keats's heart aches, and a drowsy numbness pains his sense.

Skywriter's Block

"They seem to be most concerned with what shape it is."

'Well, as I live and breathe. If it isn't Rex Harris! I thought you were extinct.'

Mr. Bubbles was beginning to regret sending his son off to clown college. 'Is that what they teach you, up at that fancy school of yours?!'

"Everybody's a comedian. When I asked the clerk if he had this size bolt, he laughed and asked, 'What are you - some kind of nut?'"

No infrastructure problem here

'A room with double beds, please.'

'Hope you don't mind the boxing gloves. I'm no good at hands.'

'Your Chef's Surprise, sir -- a sauteed whoopee cushion.'