Comedic Take On Cleaning Gifts

Mr. Clean Enough

Things my vacuum likes to suck up

This is the last time I ask Peterson to dust for prints.

"Ma'am, you don't have an ant problem. They're coffee grounds."

"How do you know it's my leaves clogging the shower drain?"

'Hello, is that the employment agency? It's about the domestic you sent me.'

"I sentence you 500 hours of community service - You can start by mopping this floor."

Shepherds washed their socks by night.

"Nice try Kevin, but you've put all your laundry into the dishwasher!"

'Hey! By appointment only!!'

'Good, lots of waxy buildup.'

'Don't worry about the dishes. I did them.'

'How damp is this place? Let me put it this way: I use mold and mildew remover as a skin care product.'

'After this my bath water will never seem the same!'

Rubbing alcoholics anonymous.

Grooming for beginners.

"One checker, two packs of cigarettes, two screws, one teapot bird, one piece of coal, three lighters, one Christmas light, one clove of garlic, four boxes of matches, two books, three pieces of broken dish, eggshells, one saltshaker peg, one pen, one cre

'I try to get this place smelling of cat and she wants it to pong of lemon.'

Carpet cleaning

'...Then I swept down the staircase, into the ballroom.'

'Your halo didn't slip. You've got ring around the collar.'

What if pets did housework...

'You talk about a clean dog!'

"You have no idea what I've been through."

Mrs. Bortluber saves all the gunk she cleans from her computer.

"Stop using math to make me look bad."

Witch on broom followed by witch on hangglider dustpan

"So what? Germs are also invisible!"

"I can skip my bath tonight. I put the windows down when Dad drove through the carwash."

"When I told you to change your socks... I didn't mean from one foot to another!"

"Your shirt's on inside out."

Using a Snow Blower in Dorm Room.

Janitor on the Job Training.

Things my vacuum cleaner likes to suck up

"During the operation I had a true out-of-body experience and I have to tell you, there is a lot of dust on top of those lights."