Cleaning Comedian Gifts

'Well, I got that nasty stain out of the carpet!'

An umpire vacuum's home plate.

Policeman make a witch use her broomstick to clean up.

'Don't worry about the dishes. I did them.'

Mrs. Bortluber saves all the gunk she cleans from her computer.

'...Then I swept down the staircase, into the ballroom.'

Striving to reduce our dependence on fossil fuels, scientists attempt to harness the energy of a toddler's tantrum.

Things my vacuum likes to suck up

"Can I get this to go in an organic, locally recycled, eco-friendly doggie bag?"

This is the last time I ask Peterson to dust for prints.

Recycling bottle bank.

"Ma'am, you don't have an ant problem. They're coffee grounds."

Climate Conference. I'm glad you enjoyed my speech, but please don't call it the "high-water mark."

"How do you know it's my leaves clogging the shower drain?"

'Hello, is that the employment agency? It's about the domestic you sent me.'

'Good, lots of waxy buildup.'

'I'd say that our transport policy couldn't get any greener'

'OK, here are the rules: We can't be seen by humans and can't leave droppings around, otherwise, they'll close the restaurant...'

'How damp is this place? Let me put it this way: I use mold and mildew remover as a skin care product.'

'After this my bath water will never seem the same!'

Laundry baskets labelled 'pajamas' and 'not pajamas'.

'It's a very common plant on earth.'

'Congratulations, Hightower. You now lead the league in untainted urine samples.'

"Hide? What do you mean hide? We are literally camouflage and they still eat us!"

Now sanitize the lamp and yell your wishes.

Carpet cleaning

"We think he picked it up at the kennel."

'Your halo didn't slip. You've got ring around the collar.'

'How can anyone say our factory isn't green? Most of our waste is that colour!'

"So what? Germs are also invisible!"

"Stop using math to make me look bad."

"You have no idea what I've been through."

Hell - "You can say what you like about this place.. At least they keep it clean."

Witch on broom followed by witch on hangglider dustpan

'You talk about a clean dog!'