Comedic Situations Enthusiast Pillows

"What makes you think I'm pregnant?"

Wedding Day Itinerary.

'They all laughed when I told them that I was going to marry a magician.'

"Dare I ask for mustard?"

"Boss, I guarantee you that my intentions with your daughter are serious."

'Please, could you me to Polish my diet!'

"Good news...turns out it was just your battery!"

''It's me or your stupid racing pigeons' I said - then immediately regretted it.'

"Oh, come on! I've told you, I'm not your 'imaginary friend.' I'm your father."

"You heading south again this summer?"

"Young lady! You aren't going anywhere dressed like that!"

Knife-thrower.

Vestibular Nerve: What it takes for a Vestibular System to wear paisleys with with pin stripes.

"Sorry I'm late: I was hitching a ride but when the driver noticed me, he panicked and we had an accident..."

Husband electronic tagging control centre - Screen reads 'Pub'

Student to teacher: 'If my paper is late it's because I'm waiting for the most current event.'

"Any luck"

'If they let me take you home for christmas, I'll be able to unwrap you with the presents...'

"I brought popcorn..."

'Oh... I was supposed to swallow the pill?!'

"When you said you were getting a pet to help you through the lockdown, I thought you meant a cat."

'So, what have we learnt here? We do not have knife fights on the bouncy castle!'

"Well, of course you have a heart."

"My dad really went ballistic! I'm not grounded...I'm under house arrest!"

"Hello?- Anyone here?"

Eskimo in Igloo

'To thumb a lift from this one mate, you must be tired of life!'

'He doesn't like to be called an Optometrist. He prefers the title 'Visionary'!'

Hmmm, this reminds me...your mother called last night.

Jungle explorers face giant hairball.