Comedic Intellect Gifts

Your IQ is 176, Peel. - 'Is that high?' - 'That's higher than Stephen Hawking.' - 'Wow!' - 'Maybe you'll be a great physicist one day.' - 'Will I shrivel, too?' -

"The way he stacks those blocks, I see repression, some hostility, and a lot of dissatisfaction with his place in society."

Yomp Foundation Presentation committee: 'Don't let the gong intimidate you!'

'He attained Nirvana in two weeks? - he's GOTTA be using steroids!'

It isn't widely known that Michelangelo was the first in a long line of cartoonists to buck the family tradition.

Candid Camera store.

'I can make out the nude, but I don't see the submarine.'

Zoo: No Hunting.

"Rapunzel's gone punk."

'Let's call him lucky!'

"I'll be a bit late... sorry."

"There Adam. Isn't that a lot more comfortable than that silly little fig leaf?"

Man walking a long dog on a fishing rod.

I'm not substitute teaching after all. How come? They wanted a criminal background check! I was a principal for 15 years. They know me! Yes, but

'He keeps grounding out the energy flow.'

"That's enough about the noggin and the schnoz. Let's move on to the tummy-wummy and the keister."

Genetic Fingerprinting.

'A new musical - Einstein's quest - rehearsal'

"You never laugh at my jokes... "

Thumbing a Lift.

'Keep repeating to yourself: I am a high flyer, I will not dive for the salmon.'

'Don't call the Nobel Committee just yet: We forgot to calibrate the instruments before the experiment...'

"Extra large sanitary pads and extra small ones, pads for the night..."

'I'm sorry Martha, but I've fallen in love with a light bulb.'

I must be losing my grip, he didn't query the bill...

X-RAY

"Mum can you come home quick, dad's started to make an exhibition of himself again!"

'This stuff is all well and good son, but when are you going to get a proper job?'

"Since when isn’t a taxidermied animal a comfort pet?" "Since forever!" "Dang it!"

'As soon as I mention Nietzsche - stop serving me, okay.'

I'm here to update your census form. Since you mailed the form in, have any of your children moved back in with you?

Smart 3 Piece Suite.

Monkey Business College

'Well, you heard wrong -- Zen Buddhism doesn't have a Missouri Synod.'

'We've minimized your tax liability by losing a lot of your principle.'