Comedic Biblical Admirer Gifts

"I think we should see other people!"

Moses' Tablet

Trumpeter swan meets trombone swan.

The Reason Ed isn't mentioned in the bible.

"Lord, business is slow and I'm getting frustrated. If I change my name to 'Job' would that give me more PATIENTS?"

"At lease we managed to stop the leak before the water reached 'E' Deck."

"And on the fourth day god finished the work that he had done and he rested. . ."

"Erm, I don't think it meant just before the ceremony!!"

Joseph and his coat

Monkey's Ejected from the Garden of Eden

"I’ve gotta tell you, there’s a lot of demand for a sequel."

Need tickets.

Animal Olympics: 'What do you say next year we have some non-cheetah races?'

"He is stingy. If he is giving gold it's only because prices have hit rock-bottom..."

Teacher to student: 'I taught your father. He owes me $3,000 for therapy.'

" 'How I Spent My Sabbatical,' by Professor Harvey Brinkman."

"Gimme a break, guys, it's just until I get the hang of it."

Three tailors block the street, forcing a passerby into their shop.

"This is the future of logistics. Thanks to our new technology this parcel can miss-send itself to somewhere in Kazakhstan."

'Why would I want an ocean-going yacht when I've got a rocking chair in my front porch?'

Moses Holds Ten Commandments: Do Not FOLD, STAPLE OR BEND.

Panic Stations in Heaven's Bakery - 'He needs 5000 loaves of bread and he needs them NOW!'

'Gentlemen, it's time to face the truth - we have absolutely no idea what we're supposed to do'

"The Bible . . . that would be under self-help."

"So all is not rosy in the garden?"

Tattoo

"Sitteth."

"I'm under a restraining order."

'Palestine? -- We were hoping for someplace further AWAY than that.'

Food Fight At The O.K. Buffet.

'Now all we need is 5,000 packets of tarter sauce!'

The Nativity

I'm the gorilla's nuts... I'm the dog's bo****ks... He's never been good at hiding his light under a bushel.