Color Guru Gifts

'Did you notice how her pink nail polish clashes with her red tricycle?'

"I have to change my hair style again. My parents said they love it!"

CLOTHES-HORSES OF THE ART SCENE

Handbag store - "Perfect."

'We live in difficult times. These underwear don't help one bit.'

'Now THAT'S a presentation! Great delivery, great graphics, and he moonwalks from the room.'

'She's so put together!'

If nobody had invented graphics

A women in a shoeshop.

The difference between cosmology and cosmetology.

'Good news - basic black is being shown this season.'

"Most of these pelts were suicides."

"The derby is better. That makes you look like Abraham Lincoln."

Keeping warm.

"Absolutely not!"

"And now. . . which shoes?"

Four Common Lampshade Mistakes and How To Avoid Them.

"I feel like we've walked into some sort of epidemic of hipatitus."

'I could do that.'

"You look great. One problem though: I'm the one who goes to work."

'I just love this work from his macaroni period,'

'This is our bestselling power tie. Just put it on and clap twice.'

Mr Metrosexual.

The Rise of Modern Art

At the suit makers

"Diamonds are so three billion years ago..."

'Do you like my little black number?'

'Wow, talk about genius!'

'Trust me, it's very proper to mix stripes.'

"It's the only way I can justify buying so many shoes."

"That shirt is so last year."

'I can't move in, Ted - your lifestyle is too modern. And your furniture is way too modern.'

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"

'She thinks it makes her look enigmatic.'

"Everybody should live in a market economy. It's terrific."