Graphic Guru Gifts

'I am playing outside, Mom -- look at the graphics.'

'Before I save you - you should know that I'm having a 'Design my superhero logo' contest. The winner gets a $50 gift card!'

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

'It's a chart of office morale. This is where you went on vacation.'

Project Length As Measured In Dog Years

"You created a robot to do your homework for you? Apparently, laziness is the mother of invention."

'Now THAT'S a presentation! Great delivery, great graphics, and he moonwalks from the room.'

'He's not as studious as he looks - his backpack is full of comic books.'

"Fantastic presentation! All of the investors loved it."

If nobody had invented graphics

"Actual results indicate that the statistical analysis of the data which projections were based on may have been wrong."

"Right, before we look at the covid figures for today, do we need another sheet of paper?"

'It finally took me thirty years, but I finally have one of every 3-D comic book ever made'

Four Common Lampshade Mistakes and How To Avoid Them.

"Peterson proposes we move out of the mountains."

'I could do that.'

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

ACME Balloon Company.

Turning Japanese: I really think so.

"We've done a rigorous examination of your business plan using the latest algorithms to model future profits. . . which way up would you like it?"

'I just love this work from his macaroni period,'

Let's Celebrate

The Rise of Modern Art

"Now this chart should clear up any confusion you have with the report."

He then drew a number of smaller pie charts behind the bigger chart. That helped to put it into perspective.

Sales chart plummets into employees head.

"At least we are consistently inconsistent."

'It's not surprising. The production department is in Spain, the warehouse is in Korea, the accounting division is in Bolivia, the board of directors is in Canada.'

'Now this is my kind of green!'

'Wow, talk about genius!'

"Thank you, Harris - I get the picture."

' A new idea '

But under a different accounting convention ...

'And right here they merged...'