College Dropout Supporter Gifts

"Dad, I took the money out of my college fund, but I decided not to go to college."

'As a beginning teacher, you know you come here prepared to teach and become a good teacher. As you gain experience, you will learn that you also come here to care and become a great teacher.'

"Being the smartest girl in third grade is going to Melinda's head."

"Congratulations Professor, the committee 'okayed' your grant request."

"SUPERintendent! What kind of powers do you have?"

'Oh Darling, I'm so proud! I wish I could give you a big hug!'

"When you tell your Father how you're dropping out of college to be a renaissance faire entertainer, the least you could do is break character."

School administrator of the year "Accepting for Susan Curtis is her clinical psychologist."

'I'm Stacey, whose mother is the proud parent of an honor student.'

Parents teacher conference.

"Since they graduated, have any of your children moved back in with you?"

"Class, can anyone name a Hispanic hero who used non-violent methods to win better working conditions for farmers nationwide?"

"Two years at home Son, and all you've earned is points on my credit card."

"Sorry, kiddo. Your old man has to work so you can go to the best drug trials in the country>"

"I had to admit to my teacher that you helped me with my homework... She was about to put me in a 'special needs' class!"

Family.

"I teach ... to impact a life."

"The university is delighted with the endowment but is there any flexibility over calling it the 'who's the rich one now you toffee nosed bastards' wing?"

'May I be excused? The pressure is getting to me.'

'... So then, I dropped out of university and hooked up with this nudist colony.'

"Sorry I'm late. I had to wait until my Dad finished my homework."

'If you finish your first year of teaching and haven't destroyed the innate curiosity of your young students, you are a successful teacher.'

Branded? Nah, that there's a decal where my kid goes to college. OU.

"Personally, I prefer seeing the graduates dance across the stage."

"... and that this ham we're eating has enough sodium to give us high blood pressure. That's what I learned in school today."

Graduation Support Groups

It's nice to have a positive parents' night topic. College admissions. Hearing about drugs, depression and sexually transmitted diseases gets old. The 3 downer 'Ds'. Tonight we'll discuss your kids' futures in higher education. We'll cover drugs, depression, diseases and crushing debt. Correction. 4 'Ds'.

"I can speak with Billy now, Susan. While I'm thinking about it... order me another file cabinet."

Apt. for rent: Excellent school district - Student included.

'I think my teacher is very devoted. She always says she's more interested in the outcome than her income.'

"Put four. Teachers need encouragement."

Major US universities, public view: ATHLETICS...everything else.

'Remember, your success in life will be measure by how much you donate to your Alma Mater...'

"Guess who got into Hotchkiss!"

'I thought they told you that any donation, no matter how small, would be greatly appreciated.'