Graduate Supporter Gifts

"Since they graduated, have any of your children moved back in with you?"

'As a beginning teacher, you know you come here prepared to teach and become a good teacher. As you gain experience, you will learn that you also come here to care and become a great teacher.'

"Make a lot of money."

Good Luck!

'A depressing thought just came over me. Now we'll have to go out and get a job!'

Graduates on their phones

'I still want to be a cowboy.'

'I took a couple of years off after college to work on my smirk.'

"Being the smartest girl in third grade is going to Melinda's head."

'I chose my field on what would put the most impressive initials after my name.'

“Today we are going to be learning percentages.”

'I wasted a lot of time in graduate school to get this job.'

'Thank you for the apple Conrad. But in answer to your question, no, you may not address me as 'Boopsie'.'

'Tommy's doing fine. I'm concerned about your poor fund-raising record. You sold only two magazine subscriptions and one measly candy bar.'

"She's the best nit nurse this school has ever seen."

Good Luck!

The Janitor at the Harvard University Alumni Reunion is one of the Gang.

"I'm taking 'moving back in with the parents' studies."

'Does my head look big in this?'

"I guessed my way to a perfect score on the GMAT, then I guessed my way through grad school and several middle management jobs...."

Student Debt

GLAD-YOU-ATION

Hear me, Graduates!

"Quit your whining... Someday you'll appreciate affordable student housing."

'So far more education hasn't helped me get a job. I think I'll get some student loans and get some more education.'

"Congratulations Professor, the committee 'okayed' your grant request."

"They're harmless when they're alone, but get a bunch of them together with a research grant and watch out."

'You're kidding... I've got a masters in philosophy too!'

"SUPERintendent! What kind of powers do you have?"

Little Miss Muffet's Graduation.

When English majors become waiters.

'After reviewing my student loans, I wrote my thesis on deficit spending.'

We pride ourselves on having every type of insurance policy, but report card insurance is a new one to us.

Jobs for graduates

"Yes, you'll probably need to go to an elite university if you want to be able to play foosball at work."