Graduate Gifts

"I'll thank you not to quote Yeats, Godel, or any other reminders of college loan debt."

"English lit-how about you?"

"They're harmless when they're alone, but get a bunch of them together with a research grant and watch out."

An Honest Graduation Photograph

"Dad, now can I be a fireman?"

"It's not begging if you've been to college. It's attempting to arrange interim financing while restructuring your debt load."

'And finally, sir, would you like your burger flipped by a Ph.D. in Philosophy, History or English Literature?'

Liberal Arts Diploma.

Good Luck!

"When I left Princeton, I spent a summer briefcasing in Europe."

'I still want to be a cowboy.'

Graduation Day...

'After reviewing my student loans, I wrote my thesis on deficit spending.'

"It's a nightmare being a young person with a job - everyone keeps staring at me."

'Does my head look big in this?'

Lemonade cum laude

"It's a rags to riches story. He started with $80,000 in student loan debt, and now he has a job and moved out of his parent's basement."

Good Luck!

Student Loan Debt Crisis!

"Alright, I got my degree. Now where is this ticket I'm supposed to be able to write?"

Diploma/Diplomat.

After years of study & hard effort, you're ready to begin your life's work. . . paying off your student loan."

"I went to my college class reunion. Everyone else is unemployed."

'Ma! My degree in communications is finally paying off!'

'I'm working on a ten year degree. Four years in school, and six years to pay off my student loans.'

'I'm not wasting my education - I can't afford the bus.'

'Quite frankly Stephan, we're all sick of you shoving your cum laude in our faces.'

"Make a lot of money."

College tuition fees.

'This is a bogus diploma. You get the real one after you repay your student loans.'

"I'm taking 'moving back in with the parents' studies."

Congratulations 2015 graduates on this momentous step in your life...

Bright Idea

"I graduated magna cum student loan, so I'll need a big starting salary."

Graduation in 3. . .2. . .1. . .