Collecting Tales Gifts

"Same hectic routine every damn year. Mind if I hang back with you?"

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

'Are you made of sugar?'

"... And this one needs a shot of vodka."

"Damn! I'm in the wrong fairy tale. This is the three little pig's house, not the three bear's!"

Cinderella and Charming the Clown

'Come on Jill, they say the water's well good.'

Ghost puddle

"Define fair."

Goldie Locks and the three beers.

Ask A Silly Question.

7 More Dwarfs

Allergy Information: May contain traces of nuts, soya, child bones.

'Not only didn't he turn into a prince, but he gave me these awful warts!'

'Not now, Aladdin...'

'I don't remember ever having a good memory.'

"My great-uncle Octavio always wore his hat in the house. That way, if bad company knocked on the door, he could say he was just leaving."

'Tom's always been the black sheep of the family.'

"I hate to spoil your porridge, but your son has a blonde in his room."

''Masterpiece Theater' will not be seen tonight, so that we may bring you 'Slushpile Showplace'....'

Grimm's Fairytales - Pee Wit; Luring Villagers into the Lake

Library: Tall-Tales and Facts.

'Have you seen a Mr. Dumpty around?'

'He's a trier, I'll give him that.'

"No, let down your hair!"

Wonderland School. Principal. As usual, things are chaotic of the first day of school. Goldilocks has already switched desks twice. Some cafeteria equipment is missing. The dish ran away with the spoon. Cinderella was already looking at the lost and found looking for a shoe. And I just heard about a problem with Humpty Dumpty out on the playground. At least Peter Pan looks relaxed. Of course, he's been going to this school for decades.

'I've been knocking for ages!'

Absinthe Fairy.

'The Princess and the Mint.'

"I know I'm huffing and puffing, but I don't have a temperature. You're safe. Now, let me in."

"Back in my day there weren't any delivery trucks, distribution centers and fancy computers! We just hopped door-to-door until our feet bled!"

"He was going to buy. Why'd you tell him it was made with real gingerbread?"

"Grandpa! You have to let me put those under my pillow!"

' You shouldn't believe everything you read in the fairy stories.'

Brothers Grimm