Collector Of Old Tales Gifts

'I've been knocking for ages!'

"Actually, it is a bad time — I’m rushing to get the kids out of the oven."

'I'm the ghost of Christmas future. I'm hammered, can we do this later...?'

Loch Ness Beer Monster

Ghost puddle

"Define fair."

7 More Dwarfs

''Masterpiece Theater' will not be seen tonight, so that we may bring you 'Slushpile Showplace'....'

"Same hectic routine every damn year. Mind if I hang back with you?"

"I hate to spoil your porridge, but your son has a blonde in his room."

Library: Tall-Tales and Facts.

"I crawl that I may savor the richness and diversity of people and places along the way."

"Grandpa! You have to let me put those under my pillow!"

Updated Fables. The Ant And The Grasshopper … And The Mosquito. IRS.

Brothers Grimm

Oliver's reception by Fagin and the boys

'When I was your age we had to carry our water from the spring in a bucket...and then we'd get it out with a dipper!'

Floods leave man and ghost stranded.

Elf Farm

'Plus I found this great set of porridge bowls!'

Prompts on the Antiques Roadshow.

Alice Through the Looking Glass - The Black Kitten.

"No, it's just that the royal inbreeding makes me look like a frog."

Football Manager's Parrot

Little Red Riding Hood Meets Goldilocks Meets Hansel and Gretel

Rabbit.

'He's not a patient. He's an antique collector. He's interested in the magazines in our waiting room.'

"Don't bring camera, you said. Just enjoy the experience, you said."

Jesus walks on water just as Moses parts the sea.

'The problem with granddad buying hotdogs is we have to hear how cheap they were when he was a kid.'

The Ballad of Wooly Pete

Grimm's Fairytales - Jorinda and Jorindel

Krampus

Man In Desert Hunted By Shark.

'We don't offer a 401K Plan, but upon retirement, you will receive 3 magic beans.'