Cold Soup Fan Gifts

"Now we have Nancy Pelosi's gazpacho police spying on members of Congress."

"Tommy!"

'There's old Jim off to the shops. Slowed down a lot these days, ain't he.'

'okay...where did you hide it?'

"Your soup is delicious. The broth perfectly compliments the font."

Ode to a Grill

'The stage hypnotist was great, he regressed Jeff to a previous life, and discovered that he was a layabout then, too.'

If you want to play fetch with the dog, throw your own @#^* arm.

"You and your daft inventions."

'Actually, I was thinking more in terms of a temporary position.'

TV Chef Cooking Range

Trawling for Fish.

'To her...the basic 4 food groups are canned, frozen, fast and delivered.'

A Fork-lift.

'Uh Oh...Looks like we're going to finally get a little winter.'

"Don't you love this time of year when the squirrels taste like pumpkin spice?"

'These casual Fridays are killing me.'

F&E Diner. Special. Eggloo. Tink tink. The "Eggloo" is a frozen omelet!

"Do you have any ice water? Hot chocolate goes right though me."

"I prefer snow person."

'No wonder you're more tanned than I am - you are nearer the sun!'

Flatware Follies.

"All those years studying mayhem. All that postgraduate work in looting and pillaging; and here I am, rowing the friggin' boat."

"Can you make me a tall Tazo chai latte with soy milk?" Bartleby, the soon-to-be-unemployed barista.

"You want fries with that Chardonnay?"

'Too bad... so much ice but not a single glass of lemonade!'

'Why don't you stop moaning, and be grateful that mother was kind enough to invite us around for a special halloween supper!'

"Protein bars! Energy drinks!"

A rower surrounded by swarming insects

Oxford-Cambridge Boat Race, 1870 - Urchins Cheer the Carriages Home

'...I know it's a good discount but we don't need double glazing!'

'I'm not allowed in the water until I can swim.'

Sportsmen rowers overtaken by the Owl and the Pussycat

'Would you mind if this gentlemen joins you, madam? He asked for a table with a view.'

'Frozen dinners have more calories if you heat them up.'