Cold Aficionado Gifts

Man looking at a thermometer that has broken due to extreme cold

Snow flake

Good News about winter

Vending machine: NO stress, only 50 cents.

"To be honest, I don't mind the cold, and being an introvert, and slightly antisocial, I really treasure the quiet time when the others have flown south..."

It's supposed to get cold tonight.

"I believe I have just reached a whole new level of cozy."

Electric Blanket.

"I'm thinking of starting my own range of 'inactive' wear."

Born to be Mild.

'Don't take this the wrong way, Honey, but not only have I decided to hibernate this year, but I want to hibernate in the spare room...'

This Halloween, use props to create a unique jack-o-lanern. Fitness buffs might like a jumping jack. Or you could carve a lumberjack. In colder climates, Jack Frost might be a nice choice. And for something functional, build a jack!

Trawling for Fish.

"Ah! I see you've found a cold beer to your liking, sir."

"Mum? are you sure thers's such thing as global warming, coz I'm bloody freezing."

Cold Enough to Freeze Brass Monkeys.

"Would you mind getting me the Ambien, the Tiger Balm, three cookies, a cup of tea and a pillow for my legs?"

"Business trip, eh? Gee, that's too bad."

"My wife ordered ICE coffee!"

'...and the temperature is controlled by a thermostat which keeps it at a controlled zero year round.'

'Fred's a lot more relaxed since he began viewing life as just another spectator sport.'

"And unlimited freezer space, naturally..."

"I love this frosting! Can I get the recipe?"

"My f-f-feet are f-f-frozen."

Outdoor Dining: Winter Edition

"Sorry sir, it's the permafrost again!"

'The temperature isn't too bad at -15, but when you add on the wind chill factor... '

'Can I get a Chardonnay over dry ice? I hate it when my wine gets wet.'

'Honey, I'm looking fat in white!' 'Trust me, dear. In a few months, the pounds will be melting away.'

"No. Have to say we don't get many tourists around here!"

"Whale meat again – don't know where, don't know when..."

Brighton boatman offering the hire of a pleasure boat on a very cold day

Snowman arriving home to his Refrigerator Home

Igloo Building.

'Yes, we could use someone with your talents!'