Cockroach Fan Gifts

"Nonsense, Mother. You'll probably outlive us all."

They try, but those crows can't make noises they used to. The lost caws!

"Chomp... Chomp... Curry Tree..."

Butterfly herders of the wild west.

'He's got abdominal pain, dizziness and soreness in his extremities. I'll know more when I see X-rays...'

"This will sting a bit."

The worm that churned!

"Think about the honey."

'What makes you think we have a radiation leak?'

"Gotta go, lads, I smell death."

"Is it me, or would a dung beetle taste really good right now?"

"I got over DDT, and I'll get over you!"

Unwelcome guests can be caught and thrown out...there is no need to kill them.

'...and cut the croc stories, I know you're just trying to make this dull trip exciting.'

Croc feed machine contains chickens for feeding crocodiles at croc farm.

"You know, he's not nearly as scary close up!"

'Oh, that's Corky's way of saying hello.'

'Just putt the dang ball, already!'

"Sorry, but it is not negotiable! You have to let Tim clean your teeth twice a day!"

Crocodile to bird in teeth: 'On a scale of one to ten, what is your pain level?'

'Sorry Sir, but 'impersonating a log' is not a very marketable skill...'

'My hamster fell asleep at the wheel!'

Two crocodiles are eyeing off two boats full Italian and Chinese tourist - 'It's your choice for lunch Larry, Italian or Chinese?'

Worm Appreciation Society!

Spider Exhibit. It says spiders can have hundreds of children at the same time. No wonder they climb the walls! (Published originally on July 23, 2002.)

'The other one, Vince! Grab the other one! He's got a Rolex!'

A Bug's Life Advice

'No pressure, Louie!!'

Helicopter rescues mouse in maze.

Melody Cockroach.

What next?!

"Hand on a minute! Wipe your feet before you step into my mouth will you!?"

'I feel much better. I think the cheese treatments must be working.'

'Remember? It's me, Rick. I used to have the probe attached to my brain...'

Cunning Crocodile.