Cockroach Collector Gifts

Old man: 'Good news! Scientists have doubled the lifespan of cockroaches.'

Grace For Flies

The Wine Bottle and the Corkscrew

'Plastic corks, then screw caps; when they come out with a flip-n-sip Chateau Petrus I'm hanging up my tastevin.'

'He's got abdominal pain, dizziness and soreness in his extremities. I'll know more when I see X-rays...'

'Rabbits make great pets, but it's best to have them one at a time.'

The Tectonics and Their Plates.

"Can you recommend a wine that would compliment a divorce?"

"In our house the four major food groups are Bordeaux, Merlot, Chardonnay and Champagne."

true love.

When cockroaches go unchecked.

'Hold it Billy - There are no praying mantises in school.'

"Good lord, Billingsworth. You've stumbled onto the legendary Lepidopterist Graveyard."

'I've written six books on wine; owned my own winery and taught a wine class for two years. My next goal is to taste some.'

An Excellent Nose for Wine.

Red Wine

Long Corkscrew

'Sorry'

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

"I did what you asked and got rid of my white mice."

'I'm not riding with her and that jar of creepy crawlers!!'

"I've tried that one; it's a blend of 74 different red grapes - including two of the plastic decorative type."

"When a wine rates over ninety, this is not alcoholism."

'There's over 500,000 different wines? Bernie, we've got work to do!'

"I got over DDT, and I'll get over you!"

When lice dream.

"Catching butterflies is fun!"

What did you think happens to all those vitamins that roll beneath the fridge?

"I've joined a wine-lovers club. . . so far there are only three members."

"Now this is a Francis Ford Coppola. We still haven't been here quite long enough to be drinkable ourselves."

'Has he been out with your mother by any chance?'

"I'll have the computer running once I workout the bugs."

Yep the kids are loving the hotel they've made lots of new friends.

"Would you like flies with that order?"

Bottle Opener Strikes A Red Wine Well