Cockroach Collector Pillows

Old man: 'Good news! Scientists have doubled the lifespan of cockroaches.'

Grace For Flies

The Wine Bottle and the Corkscrew

'Plastic corks, then screw caps; when they come out with a flip-n-sip Chateau Petrus I'm hanging up my tastevin.'

'He's got abdominal pain, dizziness and soreness in his extremities. I'll know more when I see X-rays...'

'Rabbits make great pets, but it's best to have them one at a time.'

The Tectonics and Their Plates.

"In our house the four major food groups are Bordeaux, Merlot, Chardonnay and Champagne."

true love.

When cockroaches go unchecked.

'I've written six books on wine; owned my own winery and taught a wine class for two years. My next goal is to taste some.'

"Good lord, Billingsworth. You've stumbled onto the legendary Lepidopterist Graveyard."

'Hold it Billy - There are no praying mantises in school.'

Red Wine

Long Corkscrew

"When a wine rates over ninety, this is not alcoholism."

'There's over 500,000 different wines? Bernie, we've got work to do!'

"I've tried that one; it's a blend of 74 different red grapes - including two of the plastic decorative type."

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

'I'm not riding with her and that jar of creepy crawlers!!'

"I did what you asked and got rid of my white mice."

"I got over DDT, and I'll get over you!"

When lice dream.

What did you think happens to all those vitamins that roll beneath the fridge?

"Catching butterflies is fun!"

"I've joined a wine-lovers club. . . so far there are only three members."

"I'll have the computer running once I workout the bugs."

"Would you like flies with that order?"

Yep the kids are loving the hotel they've made lots of new friends.

"Now this is a Francis Ford Coppola. We still haven't been here quite long enough to be drinkable ourselves."

'Has he been out with your mother by any chance?'

Bottle Opener Strikes A Red Wine Well

"And would you like a wine stopper?"