Coastal Humorist Gifts

'Old fart and the sea'

'Luxury cruise you said!'

Cash Machines From Across the Land

"My wife is the queen of misheard lyrics! Listen to her singing carefully next time: it's hilarious..."

"Hey, welcome to the Catskills. Anyone here from New Jersey?"

"This is a great school but it wasn't my first choice."

"I'm the Class Clown fish."

Castro's successful invasion of miami beach.

Japanese Whaling

Well yes, I am a Blue Whale, but that doesn't mean I'm depressed...

Shark food pyramid.

"I was caught and released. But according to news reports, I remain a fish of interest."

'The trick to scaring surfers is to only show your dorsal fin when you surface next to them...'

'Where do you want to go for breakfast, fancy an Australian or do you want to nip over to Hawaii?'

"Honey! A Jewish starfish!"

"You can find me on Inkedin."

Scene on the English coast.

Ocean Liners will be Ocean Liners

"If you hurry, you can make the matinée."

'I got one this small.'

"Don't be afraid of sharks. They generally attack only when provoked."

'Thank goodness you're here!'

"Tony and Stephanie are from Iowa."

"The bailouts are nice but my retirement remains finding drugs that washed up on the beach."

'Have you ever wondered how deep the ocean would be without sponges?'

"It's odd, but once I'm full, the last thing I want to smell is blood in the water."

"I like a diet rich in surfers."

Only Percy seemed happy that the Titanic was taking on water.

So, how are you planning on eating that?

Fisherman tricks a visitor into thinking a huge buoy is a fishing float for giant fish.

'It is truly embrarrassing Doc: I faint at the sight of blood... Can you help me?'

'Well, we've been under a lot of pressure lately.'

"What's that clicking sound?"

"I live in dread of being mistaken for an undersea energy cable."