Ocean Humorist Gifts

'It is truly embrarrassing Doc: I faint at the sight of blood... Can you help me?'

'Perfect with fish?' ... That's sick!'

'He said he'd get right back to me, but I'm not holding my breath.'

"Your eyes do need correcting, but we are going to have to go with contacts!"

'Do ships 'like this' sink very often? No madam, only once!'

"So other fish swim around the ocean in FEAR?"

Shark food pyramid.

Caution! Wet floor! Slippery!

"I get it...you went south for the winter. Now, don't you think it's time to ditch the shirt?"

Sharks Eating Humans at Seaside Restaurants

Seconds before a provoked shark attack.

"I can't read any ingredients. Is it all natural?"

"Perfect Summer day! Let's go and ruin their day at the beach..."

"Honestly, Edna, he just wasn't worth it!"

When the prey becomes the predator.

'Pay no attention to Sally - she's at the height of her frenetic breeding cycle.'

"You'll like global warming because the seas will rise and this beach will be under water."

'Yeah, I know, but don't worry, I've scared the living daylights out of him: He'll never spear-fish again...'

'I wouldn't pop those if I were you.'

"So, what's the best tuna?"

"I'm hooked on these things, Carol, they're full of anti-depressants."

"This is a great school but it wasn't my first choice."

"You can find me on Inkedin."

"Do you have a can opener?"

"What did the plankton say to the whale? I can't believe you're baleen on me!...Get it? Baleen?....Whoa! Tough crowd."

Big fish can't eat the little ones.

Jelly Fish

Tinder

Commercial Fisheries News

"He's a fast worker, within minutes he has his tentacles all over you!"

"You're a bottlenose dolphin – find me a bottle!"

"Have you heard about what the fiberglass in surfboards can do to you?"

"Okay, I have a confession. I named my sea urchin."

"May I recommend Deborah, she has a perfect blend of Merlot and chocolate."

"Dad, at school today, they've asked me if the penfish is mightier than the swordfish. Is it?"