Clutter Connoisseur Gifts

"Come on in—sorry about the mess, we're just in the middle of not caring anymore."

"One day Son all this will be yours."

'Cleaning goes against entropy and the natural order.'

Why people don't have enough space

"Did you send your editor the final pages of 'Organizing Your Life'?"

Bob’s Museum

College kid rakes up his clothes on the floor in messy dorm room

'I leave it this way, because leaving it this way is a labor-saving device.'

'I'll have to do a desktop search to find the computer !'

"Hey—nice place!"

"I thought I was a hoarder, but it turns out I'm a prepper."

"Sorry about the clutter. It's been one of those weeks."

'Look what the neighbors were selling!'

'I agree. You should definitely increase your refresh rate!'

"My online account predicts the things I should own, then buys them with my credit card. It�s very convenient, but I do now need to move to a larger house."

Collectibles: Keeping In Lane, Next Exit: Knick-Knacks and Clutter.

"All my stuff is 'Rosebud'."

"I'm afraid it's a bit of a fixer upper."

Stainless steel dorms!

'At what point do you consider him a junkyard dog?'

'Architectural Digest rejected my subscription again.'

"It's Saturday lunch time, Dear...of course there's something horrible fermenting under the...our teenage son!"

A catch-all is born.

"It's too late for Jim. The tchotchkes have him now."

"One day at a time, Ethel, I take it one day at a time. So far this year, it has been the usual assortment of useless junk. Last week, he located a dump scow, and he spent all this week dragging a 1929 Ford engine block out of the river. . ."

"I consider myself to be a counterproductive member of society."

"I've been thinking it over, Tom, and I've concluded that there's no room in this family for two people."

"I'm running a loose ship."

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

"It looks like our house got sick and threw up the attic."

"I didn't spark joy."

"It has come to my attention that some work-from-home employees aren't maintaining company standards."

'Congratulations on your purchase of the new Kablooey! Desk Organizer! Instructions for use...'

Fact: The average person spends 4.3 hours per week looking for things that are misplaced, misfiled or mislabeled.

'Being stuck on a desert island is one thing, but being struck on a desert island with a hoarder...'