Clutter Enthusiast Gifts

'I'm giving mostly gift certificates this year, so I wrap them with junk from the garage to throw people off track.'

'You've been on eBay again, haven't you?'

"But this way I know where everything is."

'Brad is determined to get on that show about tv hoarders.'

College kid rakes up his clothes on the floor in messy dorm room

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

"Your children are adorable...and so shiny!" "Thanks. I them in dish detergent."

"My online account predicts the things I should own, then buys them with my credit card. It�s very convenient, but I do now need to move to a larger house."

Raptures

Dogs shaving

"There, all neat and tidy!"

"It's too late for Jim. The tchotchkes have him now."

"I just cleaned that glass! How can it already be covered in nose prints?!"

Al puts tiny diapers on his fish.

Bob’s Museum

"I thought I was a hoarder, but it turns out I'm a prepper."

'I agree. You should definitely increase your refresh rate!'

"Teddy, you call this a 'clean room'?"

"All my stuff is 'Rosebud'."

"Yeah, I keep a clean desk. Now all the mess is in the computer!"

Spring Cleaning

"I tidied away all the cushions and stuffed toy animals. It appears we never had a bed."

A catch-all is born.

Jesus as a child - 'Just look at my clean floor! What have I told you about walking on puddles?'

'Hows it coming?'

"Think it can last 20 seconds this time?"

'Mom, I'm only late because you told me not to come in until I wipe my feet first.'

"I got my wife a book on decluttering and the first thing to go was me."

'I leave it this way, because leaving it this way is a labor-saving device.'

"Of course we don't mind you working from home - we'd just rather it was from your own home, Mr Webb."

Interior Un-Decorator: We Help You Downsize!

"I'm running a loose ship."

Decluttering. . .

The Messy Sink

"Thank God!"