Clutter Curator Gifts

Ernie, cramming a lifetime's worth of junk into every cupboard, closet and corner of your home makes you a hoarder, not a prepper.

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

"It looks like our house got sick and threw up the attic."

"I didn't spark joy."

College kid rakes up his clothes on the floor in messy dorm room

"It has come to my attention that some work-from-home employees aren't maintaining company standards."

"My online account predicts the things I should own, then buys them with my credit card. It�s very convenient, but I do now need to move to a larger house."

Shoe addict.

"There, all neat and tidy!"

"It's too late for Jim. The tchotchkes have him now."

'Congratulations on your purchase of the new Kablooey! Desk Organizer! Instructions for use...'

Fact: The average person spends 4.3 hours per week looking for things that are misplaced, misfiled or mislabeled.

'Being stuck on a desert island is one thing, but being struck on a desert island with a hoarder...'

"Oh, don't mind that, it's just my body of unseen work."

"I discovered our home can be programmed to spit out any unnecessary clutter."

"There are those who write books to be read and other who write novels for bookshelves."

"You won't believe this but I haven't a thing to wear"

'I've misplaced everything.'

Gardener's Calendar: Try to put the other things back...

"Please don't interrupt Mommy when she's in her gym slash office slash living room slash cafeteria."

'Eee,love - this place gives me a great idea for the spare bedroom!'

The Move.

Bob’s Museum

'Mint?! These taste like cardboard!'

College student cleans messy dorm room littered with clothes with leafsnow blower

"I thought I was a hoarder, but it turns out I'm a prepper."

"We really have to catch up on our New Yorkers."

"Of course I care about the environment, I never throw any clothes away."

Hat Boxes, in the Closet

"All my stuff is 'Rosebud'."

'I agree. You should definitely increase your refresh rate!'

'Sir, I've got a computer to avoid a giant mess but unfortunately I can't find the computer in this giant mess!'

A Mom's Purse

Categories are the key to organizing.

A catch-all is born.