Clutter Conquerors Gifts

'First I put some odds and ends in storage, then some furniture, and finally, Edgar.'

"I guess breakable things need to be more careful around me."

'Would you mind throwing out some of your spare motorcycle parts? I'd like to park my car in the garage.'

"Of course I care about the environment, I never throw any clothes away."

'Let's face it. We have an environmental crisis of our own!'

Raking Leaves/Raking the Front Room.

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

"It looks like our house got sick and threw up the attic."

Rage.

"I didn't spark joy."

College kid rakes up his clothes on the floor in messy dorm room

"My online account predicts the things I should own, then buys them with my credit card. It�s very convenient, but I do now need to move to a larger house."

Politicians' basements (as seen on TV)

"It has come to my attention that some work-from-home employees aren't maintaining company standards."

"Do you remember, Peg—are we on our way out or on our way back?"

"There, all neat and tidy!"

"It's too late for Jim. The tchotchkes have him now."

'Congratulations on your purchase of the new Kablooey! Desk Organizer! Instructions for use...'

Fact: The average person spends 4.3 hours per week looking for things that are misplaced, misfiled or mislabeled.

"I discovered our home can be programmed to spit out any unnecessary clutter."

'Being stuck on a desert island is one thing, but being struck on a desert island with a hoarder...'

"Oh, don't mind that, it's just my body of unseen work."

'I've misplaced everything.'

Gardener's Calendar: Try to put the other things back...

The day Bob finally understood radiation of species.

"Please don't interrupt Mommy when she's in her gym slash office slash living room slash cafeteria."

'Eee,love - this place gives me a great idea for the spare bedroom!'

The Move.

Bob’s Museum

"I thought I was a hoarder, but it turns out I'm a prepper."

'I agree. You should definitely increase your refresh rate!'

"All my stuff is 'Rosebud'."

"We really have to catch up on our New Yorkers."

'Sir, I've got a computer to avoid a giant mess but unfortunately I can't find the computer in this giant mess!'

"We need a better piling system."