Clutter Conquering Champion Gifts

"We need a better piling system."

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

"It looks like our house got sick and threw up the attic."

Rage.

"I didn't spark joy."

College kid rakes up his clothes on the floor in messy dorm room

"My online account predicts the things I should own, then buys them with my credit card. It�s very convenient, but I do now need to move to a larger house."

Politicians' basements (as seen on TV)

"It has come to my attention that some work-from-home employees aren't maintaining company standards."

"There, all neat and tidy!"

'Congratulations on your purchase of the new Kablooey! Desk Organizer! Instructions for use...'

Fact: The average person spends 4.3 hours per week looking for things that are misplaced, misfiled or mislabeled.

"It's too late for Jim. The tchotchkes have him now."

'Being stuck on a desert island is one thing, but being struck on a desert island with a hoarder...'

"I discovered our home can be programmed to spit out any unnecessary clutter."

'I've misplaced everything.'

Gardener's Calendar: Try to put the other things back...

The day Bob finally understood radiation of species.

"Please don't interrupt Mommy when she's in her gym slash office slash living room slash cafeteria."

'Eee,love - this place gives me a great idea for the spare bedroom!'

The Move.

Bob’s Museum

College student cleans messy dorm room littered with clothes with leafsnow blower

"I thought I was a hoarder, but it turns out I'm a prepper."

'I agree. You should definitely increase your refresh rate!'

"Of course I care about the environment, I never throw any clothes away."

Woman puts a targeting sight on her vacuum cleaner.

'Sir, I've got a computer to avoid a giant mess but unfortunately I can't find the computer in this giant mess!'

"All my stuff is 'Rosebud'."

"We really have to catch up on our New Yorkers."

'The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your actions.'

A Mom's Purse

Categories are the key to organizing.

'Hows it coming?'

A catch-all is born.