Clumsiness Champion Gifts

'The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your actions.'

All Thumbs Store

Glass and Porcelain Store: Elephants must remain outside.

A polar bear has slipped and is sprawled out on the ice next to a yellow caution sign that features a slipping figure.

"I'm the ghost of clumsy past."

"Just great...on my first day on the job."

Man carrying crates of eggs about to step on sleeping dog.

'I told you not to slam the door!'

'Guess who I bumped into today? EVERYBODY!'

"I'm here because I keep bumping into old friends. Like, literally bumping into them."

Man reading letter, 'You may already be a winner' about to step on rake.

"Oh my God Ruth, it's that bull again!"

Cat in bandages and on a crutch.

"The good news is I've cleaned up my office. The bad news is I think I threw out my computer."

"I don't think it's possible for your room to get any messier!"

'Do you still wonder why you were passed over for accounting research manager?'

The Creative Process

"I dropped my phone and even though I picked it up within 5 seconds, the screen still cracked."

'What can I say? The Feng Shui in the litter box was off.'

Unlucky sculpture.

'When I get the clumsies, switch me to a sippy-cup.'

'I can't get into my room because of all the clothes, books and C.Ds piled up against the door, so we have to go in this way.'

"I can't believe this! When I was your age, I never hit a ball through a window!"

'You have to try to be more careful, Daddy - You almost broke little Mike's roller skate!'

'How can you be so clumsy, Fred? That's the third time today you've tripped in the sand!'

Man carrying lots of brushes is about to trip over one.

Man knocked out by doorframe leading into a basketball court.

'Darn it, Marvin! Can't you do anything right?'

'Little help here?'

"Did you make all these 911 calls?"

'To be honest, I'm surprised you employed me!'

'Hip pointers are not the most serious sports injuries. They're just really embarrassing.'

"Sorry, I haven't had chance to watch much TV since I went to turn down the radio, tripped over a magazine and a framed poster fell on my head..."

"Here's to a clean start ..."