Cloud Comedy Gifts

'It's okay, they're holy smokes.'

"I never knew God was such a sports fan."

'I knew there was part of the pattern missing!'

"I do tech support for the cloud."

'Pre-existing conditions - What did YOU die of?'

"What would you recommend pairing with the school of cod fish?"

"As we're here for eternity, I expected at least a television."

Damn defibrillators.

An angel bangs a broom on a cloud

God asks an angel for change for a tower viewer.

"How much storage does he bleedin' want?!"

'Edward de Vere? -- give me a break!'

"It was just a near-death experience, but while you're here, would you help me with this computer?"

'If this is really Heaven, why do you have a desk job?'

'If it's sympathy you're after... forget it !'

"What's the wi-fi like?"

'...And kids are an enormous meteor shower.'

'Nobody likes a show-off, bub!'

"Nope, wrong password. You've got two more tries..."

'Just sayin' it was a lot more relaxing around here before they invented ‘the Cloud.''

"User name and password?"

'Early retirement...I had pictured that differently!!!'

'First of all, thank you for enrolling in our rewards program.'

"Omniscient?? - I think you're confusing me with google. . .!"

"Sorry. I'm molting."

"We are now jamming passengers into rows 24 through 36."

'Eight hundred million channels and there's still nothing good on!'

"Relax, he can't see us from here."

'Oh dear, you should have left this one til last.'

"And on the 5th day, God's agent negotiated digital content rights..."

'Don't you think it's strange that it's called mooning when the moon never actually shows its backside!'

'Oh yeah? So who died and made you God?'

"Sorry, but you've been 'Unfriended'."

'Apparently it's no longer cost effective.'

"I never thought I'd miss ringtones!"