Cloud Comedist Gifts

'If this is really Heaven, why do you have a desk job?'

"I never knew God was such a sports fan."

"I was going to play the Moonlight Sonata, but I forgot the key."

"I do tech support for the cloud."

'Pre-existing conditions - What did YOU die of?'

An amplified harp

"As we're here for eternity, I expected at least a television."

Damn defibrillators.

An angel bangs a broom on a cloud

God asks an angel for change for a tower viewer.

'Edward de Vere? -- give me a break!'

"I'm not unhappy, just surprised at all the other denominations that are here."

"How much storage does he bleedin' want?!"

"It was just a near-death experience, but while you're here, would you help me with this computer?"

"We had to park your car in the cloud and, unfortunately, sir, I'm afraid it may have been deleted!"

Finally, a big puffy hand for the losing team.

'Whoa! Time out. The loud guy in the white shirt is right - that was a ball. My mistake. Sorry everyone. Thank you, sir.'

'If it's sympathy you're after... forget it !'

"The first thing newcomers seem to want to do is make a 'cloud angel'."

"What's the wi-fi like?"

'Nobody likes a show-off, bub!'

"User name and password?"

'Early retirement...I had pictured that differently!!!'

'First of all, thank you for enrolling in our rewards program.'

"Omniscient?? - I think you're confusing me with google. . .!"

Skywriter parachutes out of plane after writing 'I QUIT'.

"And on the 5th day, God's agent negotiated digital content rights..."

"We are now jamming passengers into rows 24 through 36."

'Oh dear, you should have left this one til last.'

"Sorry, but you've been 'Unfriended'."

'Oh yeah? So who died and made you God?'

"Relax, he can't see us from here."

'Eight hundred million channels and there's still nothing good on!'

'Apparently it's no longer cost effective.'

'It's okay, they're holy smokes.'