Cloud Chuckler Pillows

Keyboard in Heaven

"What's all this I've been hearing about the Cloud?"

'What he said about judgement day is scary. Maybe we should find a good lawyer.'

"G.P.S. FOR GUYS"

"No, nothing wrong. Just a great excuse for not 'noticing' some folks."

Where 'Pastor'-ized Milk Comes From...

"Your mom needs to know that you made it here OK, and your dad wants to know if you could use a few bucks."

'Haven't seen you in church lately John?'

'Perhaps he's heard we're losing our churchwarden.'

'Next time the pastor asks if you know what his sermon was about, the answer is not about three hours.'

'Golly, is it that time already?'

Sermon - why our religion is really better than yours.

'I'm all tired out from creating - let's just use NATURAL selection from now on.'

"I hear he has a reputation as a loose Canon."

"Actually, they all look alike to me."

"If global warming is a left wing plot... it's a very good one."

'If the Lord had wanted us to use the metric system, there would have been ten apostles!'

'Look, Brother Timothy - a sign from God!'

"Here's the problem. Your computer isn't obsolete, you are."

"You're not helping the methane problem, you know."

"Turn to page 12 for our non-binary singalong."

"Oh, oh - looks like a blue shift."

"But if you teach him to fish, you have fed him for a lifetime."

Nobody noticed when poor Farmer Jack froze to death in the snow at the front of his farm.

"We learned in Sunday School about how Cain whacked Abel."

"...lettuce pray."

Sunday School. Strange --- Apples were forbidden, but apparently fried foods were okay.

"I was in purgatory only briefly and they've been sending me email newsletters ever since."

"Will this global warming mean we'll have longer summer vacations?"

"Hey, this is a good bit- did I say that?"

Hey diddle, diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow finally landed on the moon.

He's very defensive about his personal space.

'They come down here to smoke.'

'You want a second opinion? -- Oh, a big shot, eh?'

"It's weeder's elbow."