Clinic Comic Appreciator Gifts

'I'll have to reschedule your appointment -- the doctor had an attack of squeamishness.'

Prospective hospital employee: 'I do sutures. Are there any openings?'

Cow being force fed hormones and producing milk.

Mou...Man trap!

'You're giving me a flu-shot? Shouldn't you be giving me an anti-flu shot?'

'I'm an extremely general practitioner.'

"Oh boy, by the way this guy is moving, we can assume he's got some of our friends in his pants..."

"Doctors, Gilby, Beam and Henson. Ears, nose and throat."

'You think you have it rough. Try organizing a waiting room.'

'Well, it's kind of an IV enema!'

New, Improved Cat

'Sometimes it's not a very good idea to be indecisive.'

Wrong ways to wear a face mask.

"Typical! - The Frobishers' have fire and the wheel..."

Doctor, I can't feel my legs! I know you can't, I had to amputate your arms.

"Who wants to go for walkies?"

"Actually that's not the cause of your persistent headaches."

"I've got pride but no shame."

Self-Esteem Clinic.

'Level with me, Doc — it's contagious, isn't it?'

'What seems to be the problem?' - 'I've got bubonic plague.' - 'Okay... so what symptoms do you have?' - 'Well, I feel chilly and I had a muscle cramp. They're both symptoms of plague.' - 'I hate Wikipedia.' - 'It says here that you should prescribe...'

A Wally Yomp Psychologist...Practice limited to people who are really miffed!

'S**t!'

'The lab report just came in. The lab is in fine shape!'

"The mood Disorders Clinic is three floors up, and then two floors down."

'Now what?'

Well there's something you don't see every day...

"If it wasn't for my Hippocratic oath, you'd be dead by now."

"Now where was I?"

'Put the sword back in the stone right now, little girl, and we'll pretend this never happened.'

"Do we have any candy?"

'I told you to be careful near my piercings, Gavin - they're not beer can ring pulls, you know!'

"Tick, tick, tick..."