Clerics Gifts

"No thanks. 'The bald spot' is supposed to be there."

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

A paperwork machine spews endless paperwork

"Staff support"

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"Guess who brought king cake!"

'I'll be late for dinner, dear, I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

'She's a very protectice mother!' - Lifeguard at Christening/Baptism.

"It's OK, I'm preordained."

"You may now kiss the bride..."

"I said he's beginning to teethe...not tithe."

Priest's 'To do' list.

'I don't remember predetermining THAT!'

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

Two priests share a laugh outside a confessional booth

'Due to the poor response to the roof repair fund we cannot afford to lift the rafters when rejoicing in song.'

Golfing Bishop.

In and Out Tray

"Today, I'll be cherry-picking from Deuteronomy."

'So it's with a heavy heart that I leave you good people of St. Paul's and accept the calling to be minister at the Sunnydell Nudist Colony...'

He avoids wrath, envy, lust, greed, gluttony and sloth -- the problem is he's proud of it!

"Today we studied Matthew, the first in a four-part series."

'I now pronounce you man and wife, you now may kiss you sweet little bachelor butt goodbye.'

"O Lord—why art thou such a drama queen?"

"What? You broke number 3 already?"

Desk Boxes: 'In', 'Out', 'Could Go Either Way'.

Toy Shops and Educated Children

A child interrupting family prayers

"...And do you promise if you ever should divorce that you'll remain friends?"

Cleric with bible briefcase.

'No, smart guy -- it means all of them at once!'

"Reverend, I recommend you turn the other cheek."

The Kids' Table at the Last Supper

"Honey, I’ve found God!"

"In the same of the phone, the tablet, and the desktop computer."