Clerical Humor Gifts

'How well you did it will determine whether it's 'as good as done', Father.'

'Holy-Kanoly' makes his infamous 'Leap-of-Faith' jump.

"You call this a constitution?"

You were warned about mixed marriages.

"I change my mantra every two months so no one can hack my soul."

"I certainly trust this meal is kosher."

'It's good to see you, Mr. McWit, but you do realize that today is neither Christmas or Easter?'

'Please take your receipt!'

Praying mantis.

"Since we now have a leaking roof problem, it might be a good time to schedule baptisms."

'What are you giving up for Lent this year?' - 'Anchovies.' - 'I thought you hated anchovies?' - 'I do. Care for a cookie instead?' - 'Lent is supposed to be about challenge and sacrifice!' - 'Play to win, Baby!'

The Vatican's undercover mission to Antarctica, and some endangered penguins.

A woman in prayer

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

Shoe repair

"Hello. I'm here to install the new pastor."

"...I'll send you for an amniocentesis."

"This wandering in the desert for forty years thing -- It IS allegorical, isn't it?"

When The Seven Deadly Sins Come Knocking.

Excommunicate Me.

"Excuse me, Father...is the host gluten-free?"

'When I asked for your favourite Saint, I didn't think of someone like Michael Ballack, son.'

'So long as he doesn't preach what he practices.'

Nativity - The sitcom

Pre-nuptual Nativity

'Are you putting on your Sunday Best, Felix?'

"I like what you have here but the title seems a little pushy."

"Thanks Moses, but I prefer my water bottled."

Churchwarden Talking to Rector

"First, do no ham."

"Gimme a break, guys, it's just until I get the hang of it."

Priests Play Good Priest, Bad Priest

"Faith cannot be bought. We do, however, offer an attractive leasing option."