Classroom Wanderer Gifts

"I know. You're confused. It's about now he usually says 'but I digress'...."

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

'Remember, Edward, inside every 'F' student is a 'D' student trying to get out.'

'I started out as a teacher's pet, and then it kind of snowballed.'

'I'm sure that you are highly qualified. It's just that we're not hiring anyone at the third grade level.'

'I'd like to challenge the test.'

"I'd like to change my major from dental to mental."

'Thank you for the apple Conrad. But in answer to your question, no, you may not address me as 'Boopsie'.'

"I wish my Dad would get off my back! It's only been nine years and he wants to know if I've picked a major yet!"

Child writes letter to Santa reading 'Sorry Santa, I DO want to go to school'.

'Life isn't fair and neither is Miss Brown!'

'I'm having a hard time balancing homework and family time.'

"If you don't wake up and get to work, I'm going to call your mom."

Global Education

"How was first grade? I don't know yet. I spent all day in the Principal's office."

"While your lesson plans were perfect, and your bulletin boards were terrific...your classroom management skills need work!"

"I wish that life was as logical as Algebra."

Lacks Structure and Meaning

Back to School

"I knew there'd be pitfalls when I became a teacher, but thirty to a classroom is too many."

'Sorry professor, my mind was some other place.'

'What did you learn at university today?'

Beginning of the school year

"Be careful, dear. People tend to lose control when faced with the newfound freedom of their first year of tenure."

'Well, Gosh...! How did you know I was an incoming freshman...?'

"Give my kid a passing grade and you could be looking at many more nice apples."

"I noticed he had punched air holes in his desk. Now I'm afraid to open it."

School boy

"But playing computer games help my. . . uh. . . dexterity, so I can do my school work better!"

'You always go that extra mile, don't you Molly.'

"That's my survival kit. It has a meditation tape, aspirin and rose-coloured glasses."

You're in the Engineering Quad, Just Back Away Slowly and Find the Humanities Quad.

"I'm Billy's mother, and this is his attorney!"

"Isn't it great? I found little 'Classroom Mode' switches behind their ears."