City Dweller Humor Gifts

"I live near Montauk point but I like to get into the city as often as possible."

City Centre Sign - Beware of the Yobs

Pedestrian Privacy Protector.

"Tight......this isn't tight...now a New York City apartment......that's tight."

THE PIED PIPER OF GRAMERCY PARK

Ancient Landmarks of New York City

"The woman on the fire escape who acted like it was a balcony"

"I thought they were cracking down on jaywalking."

Hoodie Hang-out

Apart from protest footage I forget what downtown looks like.

'Will you please stop feeding the pigeons?!'

Lift buttons read: East Side/West Side/All Around the Town.

"Excuse me ma'am, may I help you cross the road so that I can get the answer to this dumb joke my friend keeps telling?"

"The dangers of texting while walking #17"

Fish-tank Skyscraper.

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

"I can’t believe you’re doing this! I have abandonment issues! Abandonment issues!!!"

"I thought we'd eat out on the patio for a change."

"I'm thinking of leaving these crowded condos and going to a place that's been deserted for years...the mall."

How to cope in Los Angeles vs. New York

"This city is becoming unlivable."

'Guess they're still fixing the street.'

'Honey, I'm home.'

'It's an idea whose time has come, Mr. Mayor -- 'drive-through traffic court'!'

"Thank god we're out of the city."

"He knows 'sit, stay, paw' and 'upstate.'"

New York Scatological Society

Natural Phenomena of 15-E

"Could you fellas tell me if there's anyplace around here where I could find a fax machine?"

'I should've never sold my truck when I moved to the city.'

'Ok, we've rented the whole building ... oops, they just put on another floor.'

"Oh dear! Low-cost housing."

Sculptor explaining to tourist in Trafalgar Square that sculpture of pigeon is called 'Retribution - it actually doubles as a giant privy!'

"Six hundred Starbucks closing? Really? Is that on the East Side or West Side?"

Snedly and Snedly, the first company to leave the city, and take their buiding with them.