City Dweller Gifts

Urban therapy.

'Goddamn traffic...I'm late for my meditation class.'

"Luckily, our retirement funds are entirely in double lattes."

An Accident Waiting To Happen.

"We'll take it."

Introducing...Idiotman!

'I'm from the City Zoning Commission, sir -- I'm afraid that mustache will have to go.'

Tolerate thy neighbour

'Can you believe it? They still haven't picked up the trash.'

"It's a little bit small,but it's got great cross ventilation."

'These newly redundant bank employees have got a lot to learn.'

'Let's say we had jobs, and money, a place to live, and futures--how different would our lives really be?'

Man behind eight ball to pal: 'Come here, Bernie - I found a great hiding place!'

'I don't suppose you fellows know who did that to my car ...'

"Is it me, or as the rent goes up, does the apartment actually shrink a little?"

"Have you tired melatonin?"

It might take a few years, but Pete knew that one day he would get to know the neighbors.

If you don't look up, and cover your ears, and don't inhale, you'd think you were out in the country.

Welcome to the neighbourhood.

'No end in sight. Sorry.'

At One With Nature

Ancient Landmarks of New York City

Parking Yesterday, Parking Tomorrow, But Never Parking Today.

Newsstand with a sign saying "For Rent: Newsstand or Studio Apt."

'I try to eat local, but we don't grow too much up here.'

"Apparently, we're never more than six rats away from a pair of feet."

"200 years ago this was swamp as far as the eye could see."

"I'm going to give you something to help you sleep."

'Henry, lose the tourist clothes, we own a condo here now.'

'After I get my MBA I'll live in New York and summer in Europe before moving back in with my parents.'

"That's the window, dear. The bookcase is over to your right."

"And may you also bless the bounty we are about to receive from that convenience store over there."

Bus Lane - Fire Lane - Pizza Lane

'I should've never sold my truck when I moved to the city.'

Chicken Crossing.