Urban Dweller Gifts

"I would die, but I have a rent-controlled apartment."

"I'm starting to get concerned about global warming."

"The guy in the next apartment is a big-game hunter."

'We loved the location, so we simply added on.'

'Yes, the walls ARE thin, but you'll be happy to know a world-famous rapper lives in the next unit.'

Be fully present in the moment, this side of street, mon-fri, 7am-6pm.

Street signposts - 'walk the walk' and 'talk the talk'.

'I'm not stealing your parking space...We're sharing.'

Power, Money, Ego, Hype, Parking.

Plane annoys penthouse apartment.

Bob hated using the elevator as much as it hated being used.

Beer Lover.

"Scat!"

"No, I like my job. I like my apartment. I like my friends. I like our relationship. I'm just not sure I like what it all adds up to."

Travelling alarm clock for the modern urbanite

Frank and I are looking into moving to that new condo that went up next door

Kid arrives with CCTV camera, saying: 'It followed me home, can we keep it?'

"The parking is terrible, so we decided to never do anything again."

"Hard to believe this was all rain forest just fifteen years ago."

"Just think - if it really was 'unlivably small', would they have installed a permanent ping-pong table?"

Good fences make good neighbors - unless you live in a high-rise.

'I fail to note the significance of rising sea levels here on the 39th floor.'

"Good heavens, no...the roads are so busy, I'll drive you..."

'At last I have maximised my concrete option.'

'Elm and oak? The streets were named after trees that were here before the developers cut them down.'

Moses comes to Los Angeles.

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

"Flat pack furniture is my passion. It's just a shame I haven't the space to assemble it."

"To be honest I used to hear more birdsong when I lived in the city."

Fleeting illusions of happiness hour 5-7

"Sometimes, on a clear day, you can actually see a tree..!"

"Nowadays we all have to make sacrifices and 2500 bucks a month for this beautiful two-room apartment is really not too much to ask."

"The fresh mountain air is starting to depress me."

"If it wasn't for this tiny fence, I'd make a run for it."

Old Yarns