Cigarette Philosophers Gifts

The End...

The Department of Blind-Side Bias, Knowledge Gaps and Really Great Coffee.

"What do you mean 'sitting is the new smoking'? I thought fat was the new smoking?"

'They help with my nicotine patch addiction.'

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

"Your idea is strong. Really strong. But I've gotta ask myself, is it too much espresso for a decaf world?"

"If a fruit doesn't have a lolly flavour, is it a real fruit?"

Nothing like that first cup of coffee, eh, Frank?

"I see, Mr. Pipkins, we're back on the bourbon and smoking through glazed doughnuts."

'Mr Evans, I think we'd better reconsider our no-smoking policy.'

Safety first - be aware of what is around you.

"Love it! 'People of smoke' instead of 'Smokers.' "

"I wish there was an easy answer but there's a sexual subtext to consider...even if you are comliant in meeting my needs am I subconsciously placing you in the sexually subservient role or nurturer and provider."

'Excuse me,sir-those wouldn't happen to be your cigarette butts,would they?'

'If you want to smoke, you'll have to go outside.'

"Would you guys shut up and let me watch the game?"

Warning.

''Stop smoking'? -- but my psychiatrist just told me to start!'

"Damn straight, it's not as if there's a war and they just hand us our profits."

'I'll only have one pack of nicotene patches this week. My mate's supposed to be getting me some cheaper ones from abroad.'

"I'm afraid we don't allow smoking in here sir. We consider it unhygenic."

Exciting news. I've retired our small size coffee. I've replaced it with the big. What if people want jut a little bit to drink? They should order the big. Isn't it bigger? It's the same size as the old small. Just like the old medium. It's the same as before, but it now called the grandeur. And in place of the old large, I give you the skyscraper. Modern cafe theory: Same size drinks but larger names. Our prices must rise to reflect our generosity.

I'm having fun, all in all. But there is one question which I attempted to answer and no matter what, I fail: Why do candy stores have business hours?

What? Why the heck not?

"I'll keep thinking inside the box as long as they let me smoke in the box."

Don't you puff your vape at me

'Ready, set,...'

Extreme Vaping

(When Worlds Collide) (Got a light?)

'Of course these lighters doesn't work. They're especially made for non-smokers!'

Death stocks a cigarette vending machine.

"No kidding… the meaning of life is Twizzlers?!"

'Smoking or non?'

Thanks for Smoking

'Allowing prayer time at work...It's a disgrace!'