Church Leadership Gifts

Pope Francis

Inside church reactions to the Pope's resignation...

Notice on back of bishop's gown - How's My Droving.

'Technically, you do qualify for five weeks of vacation, but your request for 35 Sundays off has to go under review.'

Geoffrey Fisher

'Well, it looks like the pope is going to be there for a few more years!'

Celebration of Pope Francis's First Year as Pope.

"Looks like we found the issue."

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

'I hope you're not threatened by powerful women, because you're fired.'

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

'Now that I have your attention...'

'Williams, we're not used to receiving such excellent ideas as these, so we'd like to tone them down a bit.'

The Businessmen Have to Make Decisions from Many Options

"Stock options for your thoughts."

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

"This is a merit-based organization! Can't you see I’ve hired the very best and most qualified yes-men money can buy?"

Businesswoman Empowerment

"Miracles happen, gentlemen, but they don't come cheap."

'We've set the bar quite high at this company. It helps us control bonuses.'

'What sort of mission statement is that?'

"We need to make some cuts. We'll start with integrity, accountability, openness, and transparency."

'It's a chart of office morale. This is where you went on vacation.'

I'm looking for employees who have their own unique way of seeing things my way.

"Well, ordinary men have colleagues. Successful men have victims."

"I'm afraid 'It's a surprise', doesn't cut it as a growth strategy."

Butterfly Woman

'You could be a constant inspiration for us to come up with a plan to get a leg up on our competition...you're hired!'

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

"I was just going to say, 'Well, I don't make the rules.' But, of course, I do make the rules."