Church Humor Appreciator Gifts

"...He said he was going to make his sermons more entertaining but this is just crazy!"

'Straight paster or gay pastor section?'

'No, Father, I can't spice it up a bit!'

'Oh! It's Father O'Reilly his gone all Christian fundamental, Mrs Antrabuo missed church on Sunday visiting her nephew!'

'Holy-Kanoly' makes his infamous 'Leap-of-Faith' jump.

"Call me 'pops' one more time and I'll lace 'ya one!"

Monk Prompt

"Can the folks in the nose-bleed section hear me alright?!"

How's my sermon. . .

Bishops Snooker

The Sleeping Congregation.

'Even More Disciples'

'I noticed you don't sleep during the sermons anymore.'

"...and in conclusion..."

The ten ammendments

'The good stuff is here, under the counter.'

"Remember that it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the Kingdom of Heaven

'I really don't need to go to church, Reverend -- I feel guilty enough without it.'

'Funny in my day they all looked like WInston Churchill.'

'To avoid possible schism, a period of careful reflection is needed before changing the light-bulb.'

Finger puppets in church.

Church restrooms

Pastor puts up sign on pole stating that he is 'serving' his 1,000th sermon.

"That's my boy!"

'But, apart from the pews, the sermon, the hymns, the coffee and, 'all that praying', you'd come again?'

Next Sunday - Rap Mass! 'I thought we reached the limit when we had that jazz mass.'

Minister Starts at a New Church

'If you're a nun, where's your nunchucks?'

Applause

'I hear he has a reputation as a loose Canon.'

Eucharist

Church Parking Space Reserved For Sinner Of The Week

'I really can't think of a thing to preach about this morning, so I'll take questions from the floor.'

Delivery of Sermon within 30 minutes or your second one's FREE!

'Great escapism, Reverend!'