Christmas Cracker Gifts

"I see. And precisely what methods did you use to determine that my client was a 'bad boy'?"

'Halloween, Thanksgiving, and at last it's really you...the Big Enchilada!'

"Now that Google owns Fitbit, they know when I am sleeping, they know when I'm awake..."

'I'm Jewish on my mother's side...Happy Hanukkah!'

A cow is for milking not just for Christmas!

"Your signs didn't work, Harold."

'Tell me more about this strange man...'

"So where's the baby cheeses we heard so much about?"

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

Little league world series of poker.

Boy whistling at crackers.

How The Ice Age Began: 'OK, can we freeze it right there...'

"All the salmon has disappeared yet every door to the house was locked. Oh, it's a mystery all right."

'Tell the truth: does this affidavit make me look fat?'

"Come on guys, my jokes aren't that bad!"

'Do you practice everyday or are you always this annoying?'

"Fortunately, Mr. O'Brien, a sucker's attorney is born every half a minute."

A parrot business meeting

Cracker nice, but Polly want more.

'Not to worry, I've handled hundreds of cases like this and the way I see it, I'm bound to win one sooner or later.'

'Number 19 across, 5 letter word, starts with 't', ends with 'h'...' 'How about truth?'

Polly want a cracker?

Animal Crackers. What a mess! I have to check them all. The box says "Do not eat if seal broken" --- Does this look like a seal to you?

Husband eats popcorn wife is stringing for Christmas tree.

'Polly had a cracker.'

Looking for the vaccine

'They agreed to settle out of court.'

'The attorney will see you just as soon as you put this neck-brace on.'

"Only thing he can't crack is why his wife would just up and leave."

'I don't care what everyone else is doing, Mr. Wilson, in my courtroom we don't use pepper spray.'

'Where did you get the idea that crackers are a minimum daily requirement?'

"Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law."

Two prisoners pull a Christmas cracker, the free gift is a hacksaw.

Mouse Cracker

"We give thanks on this most special of days!"