Christmas Carol Enthusiast Pillows

'The cattle are lowing...'

Policeman says to the Little Drummer Boy: 'Your neighbours have been complaining about the constant pa-rum-pa-pum-pum.'

Scrooge and his piggy bank

Four calling birds...three French hens...two turtle doves... This is my favourite part.

"So that's four calling birds, three french hens, two turtle doves, and...oh, what the hell, we're celebrating...a partridge in a pear tree."

Hark the Herald Angels Sing

"I only count six swans a swimming."

"I dread the a-leaping season."

Bob Cratchit on Christmas Eve

"Sire, your true love has run off with one of the 10 Lords-a-leaping."

The Seventh Day of Christmas

Unanswered questions at Christmas

"Snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes..."

The Ninth Day of Christmas

'I'll be down in a mo. I'm filling in for the partridge who is on a toilet break.'

'It's called 'Feliz-Naviditis.' It often strikes store clerks during December.'

The composer of the 'Twelve Days of Christmas' song.

"As you can see, I've alphabetized the items, presents owing if you will, so if you can digitally initial here, here, here, here and here and sign there. Thank you. See you December 24."

'Looks like someone beat us to the punch.'

'Do you think that's wise?'

Santa Claus's wife beats the soot out of his beard.

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

Books: The Wit and Wisdom of Ebenezer Scrooge

Frosting the Snowman

Old Mother Goose Nursery Rhymes

Flight attendant piloting Santa's sleigh.

"Here's the deal, boys. We need to see a little more bickering. We're doing a Reality Show."

'No room at the inn, baby born in a manger: It's gonna be a great story to tell at parties...'

"I'd like a partridge in a pear tree, 2 turtle doves, 3 French hens, 4 calling birds and 7 swans a swimming."

'I'm the ghost of Christmas future. I'm hammered, can we do this later...?'

Panettone

"I don't believe in you!"

"No, you definitely wouldn't get Christmas Eve off."

"I know it's not an ideal situation, Samantha, but how else are we going to afford a 160 gigabyte laptop, a top of the range mobile and a Playstation 3 for the kids presents?"

Christmas Presents.