Chimpanzee Fan Gifts

I told you not to text me when you're swinging.

A Vet's Fight with a Chimpanzee

'Stop evolving and come in. Your dinner's ready.'

"Well, it's the first time I've noticed him!"

'It's been raining steadily now for over half an hour and he's still out there on 'slicks'.'

'I told you they weren't just herbivores.'

"Now we'll be able to understand political debates."

'Take it from me and come back. The future is definitely on land.'

"Global warming is a great icebreaker."

"Jeepers, I didn't know anything could gets so hot!"

Ice shelfie.

"Have you been throwing a lot of poop lately?"

'Freedom is nice, but I miss the Circus for the applause and the three square meals a day...'

'Come on dear, don't be shy: This little she-chameleon just wants to play...'

'Hold it! Hold it!'

Kangaroo carring joey in a pouch on her back.

'Shakespeare's Hamlet word for word - and I who always thought it was a crazy joke.'

Penguins in the form of writing Pens

'Come on, you're telling me that you don't watch the Discovery Channel.'

"Well thank you, and may I say you look quite handsome too..."

"Oh Goodie, more snow."

'I read somewhere that going green would help save the ice caps.'

'Because I don't want stretch marks, that's why.'

'If you fuss over him all the time and make his life too comfortable, he'll never leave!'

"I wouldn't mind, but I only topped the bloomin' thing up last week!"

'I hear you're typing the complete wors of Shakespeare?'

"Am I a new parent? No, I'm a new Uber driver taking him to school."

'This is not what I expected when you said we were going to help an endangered species...'

"Okay, who's the wise guy elf?"

"Don't disturb Daddy darling: he's just received his new issue of "Basic Tools Monthly"..."

"That's ridiculous. I do not have a superiority complex."

"The scientists are coming back to study us, so I want you both to be on your best behaviour this time!"

Chameleon 'Hide and Seek'...

'If you think using a stick is evolutionary, wait till you try one these dipped in chocolate.'

"Finish your anchovies and then you can evolve."