Chimp Fan Gifts

Children leaving zoo with chimp

"Read our contracts, Ms Donahue. It says 'No Sexual Harassment on the workfloor!'"

Farm Humor.

"Hurray! I just got born!"

'Sure big shot. You SAY you can cross the road, but talk is cheep...cheep,cheep.'

Dogs and Chickens

Cat protests, with sign reading 'Legalise catnip!'.

'I'm here, Mom, hanging out with some friends.'

'Catch a pair of chimps and do a complete makeover on them.'

"Say, why don't we go see the Hopper show at the Whitney?"

"A valiant effort, Mike, but just accept that you're going bald."

"Remember son, evolution peaks with us - chimps were in space before man!"

'Stop evolving and come in. Your dinner's ready.'

Man domesticates the chicken (centuries later, eggs were found to be edible).

A swan grabs a hold of a kite string.

A Migrating Chicken

"Why have you come over here?"

Listen, I'll put chocolate chips in your flapjacks, too, but I ain't makin' smiley faces with 'em.

Monkey casino study.

"Funnily enough, although Rex said I was "too chicken to try", I made the sensible choice..."

"Now we'll be able to understand political debates."

Battery Chicken.

"There's always one kid that spoils the class picture."

"Just in case I'm in danger of doing something. . . I'm going to take a cat nap."

A Vet's Fight with a Chimpanzee

'You've been approved. As collateral, we'll be holding your nuts.'

Cluck Norris in 'Missing Egg in Action'.

Ideas that failed: Seeing Eye Chickens

Saving for Winter.

"You'll have to excuse your father. He's a victim of a deepfake campaign."

Sport Darwinism

"Well, it's the first time I've noticed him!"

Pumpkin blowing out birthday candles: 'Make a wish.'

'It's been raining steadily now for over half an hour and he's still out there on 'slicks'.'

Cheshire cat meets Cheshire dog