Children's Media Fan Gifts

Thomas the Tank Engine. Harold the Helicopter. Bob the Crane

Fat Kid 10- Eats an ice-cream

I'm allergic to parrots, so I got an aaaarrrrdvark.

Humpty Dumpty goes bungee jumping.

'What did I learn in school today? You'd better sit down.'

"I'm in children's books, myself."

The Scarecrow Gets A Brain From Igor

'My parents didn't want me getting left behind in the system.'

'I expect 'Sesame Street has seen some new developments since I was your age?'

'It's a pretty lame disappearing act Darling: I think we'd better hire a real Magician for Timmy's birthday party...'

"Before I begin, I should issue a Tigger warning."

"The bank rejected my application for a 2nd mortgage. They said they didn't have 1 in my size."

'They had to increase security. He's being stalked by a deranged paleontologist.'

Pastor of Muppets

Little Miss Muffet Does Lunch

"You've had dogs, cats, birds and even a pony. . . how come your only pets that survive are fish, Arielle?"

"Hold still - almost done."

News Hourglass

'I had to put the peas in my ears... they kept falling out my nose!'

"Well, he's learned to walk the walk, now he just needs to learn how to talk the talk."

"Let's just take the Kosciuszko."

"Three pizzas: One too hot, one too cold, and one just right."

Kids lie about watching TV. Boy says: 'It's all Bob the Builder, Fireman Sam, Postman Pat ... I'm exhausted just watching it.'

"I'm telling you, Frank, it's getting to the point where I'm seeing muppets all over the damn place."

"I didn't see you."

'You'll be happy to know I'll be moving out of your closet as soon as there's a vacancy under your bed.'

'All right, pal, that's enough! Are you gonna pay for the paper or not?'

Old MacDonald Christmas.

"As Piglet said, Honey Sales are down. But sales of Empty Honey Jars That Hold Popped Balloons are way up."

"So, you think clowns are stupid? How about pediatricians, … Do you think they're stupid too?"