Childcarers Gifts

"My parents are the same way. Lots of ostentatious child-rearing, very little direct nurturing."

City Zoo: Day Care

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

In the Guru District

'Please tell me you're baby sitting?'

Mum and baby both have pacifier.

Children's Parties

"Someone once told me that kids grow up so quickly. I hope there's some truth to that."

Madonna of the Pukes.

You can't just switch them. If your wife asked you to change the baby, she probably meant the diaper.

Cry babies.

'Br'er Fox said 'I'm going to throw you into the briar patch'...And Br'er Rabbit said, 'Please,please don't taser me!''

"Look Mommy, hat!"

The Baby Walker

Weekday Morning Hell Bingo

Catching Jeffrey To Change His Diaper.

'William, I've decided to go back to work so I can get a little rest during the day.'

'OK, now let's be careful out there.'

Teacher pointing to P,Q, on board: "OK class, which letter comes next? Redbeard, you should know this."

'Don't worry. It's never too hot or never too cold.'

Fat Kid 10- Eats an ice-cream

T"ruly, Susan, I envy no man."

Interior design trends for parents....

'You call it a bra. I call it excess packaging.'

'The child is very illogical'

"I said he's beginning to teethe...not tithe."

'They don't understand goo-goo-gah-gah. Dumb it down to WHAAAAAH!'

"Guys, can you use your Mommy-doesn't-want-to-know-I-exist voices?"

'They were hoping to gradually introduce him to the pro game, but injuries left them no choice.'

"This is nice, but I can't help but think we forgot something."

"I'm beginning to regret taking this job at the local playgroup."

When a toddler hands you their ringing toy phone, you answer it!

"Congratulations, it's a lifetime of penury and countless sleepless nights!"

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown and Jill said 'I told you so'."