Childcare Gifts

"Now, now, let's try using our NPR voice."

"She does this when she's tired."

'It must be nice having a job where you can work at home.'

'To err is human. To really mess up, we've got to do some planning.'

Crying parent holds crying baby.

'It's either a boo-boo or an owwie, but the doctors need to run some more tests before they decide.'

'He's at that difficult age: 0 to 16.'

Child Development: 'He's developing just fine, those babies in the commercials aren't really talking.'

"I recommend an epidural, at least until they're off to school."

'You don't think you're just a tad overprotective?'

'I didn't get the Owners Manual. I thought you got the Owners Manual.'

'I love the peace & quiet you get at camp.'

You can't just switch them. If your wife asked you to change the baby, she probably meant the diaper.

"I liked recess a lot better before the safety helmets."

'Have a good day, sweetie. Mommy has to go to the office now and attempt to drive a stake through the heart of her competitors.'

'It was a great idea to open a day care center for kids whose parents are hunting and gathering.'

'To sped up our sandbox compliance issues I've called in a couple of sandbox experts.'

'We're quite excited. We think he's developing his first disorder.'

'Don't try to turn tail and run. That's just what they want.'

'I took my parents for granted until I had kids of my own. I don't know what I'd do if they weren't here to raise them.'

"I didn't want anything. I just wanted to see how fast you could get here in case of an emergency!"

'What are you in for?'

'You never make the same mistake twice. You always come up with a new one.'

'She just came down the stairs without walking.'

Breastfeeding - "When it's my turn, can I use this?"

'You don't think you're just a tad overprotective?'

'Superbaby...More powerful than an electric breast pump!'

'Why yes, I do remember little Timmy.'

Children with fingers in dam at Amsterdam day care center

'My chiropractor said that since I had the twins my posture has improved.'

Breastfeeding

'I'm on my way!'

'I'm about to have a tantrum. What are you doing?'

"Maybe the unseen hand of the market will change the diaper."

Housewife with her toddler hooked on the end of the mop.