Childcare Providers Gifts

"I brought frankincense." "I brought gold." "I brought diapers!" "A wise woman!"

'Bringing your kids to work with you is one of our major perks.'

Tony Blair aged 2 1/2

City Zoo: Day Care

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

In the Guru District

'Please tell me you're baby sitting?'

Mum and baby both have pacifier.

"Someone once told me that kids grow up so quickly. I hope there's some truth to that."

Madonna of the Pukes.

Children's Parties

You can't just switch them. If your wife asked you to change the baby, she probably meant the diaper.

Cry babies.

'Br'er Fox said 'I'm going to throw you into the briar patch'...And Br'er Rabbit said, 'Please,please don't taser me!''

Catching Jeffrey To Change His Diaper.

Weekday Morning Hell Bingo

A baby duck in a tiny car seat on the mother duck's back.

The Baby Walker

"Look Mommy, hat!"

'William, I've decided to go back to work so I can get a little rest during the day.'

'OK, now let's be careful out there.'

Teacher pointing to P,Q, on board: "OK class, which letter comes next? Redbeard, you should know this."

Interior design trends for parents....

Fat Kid 10- Eats an ice-cream

'Don't worry. It's never too hot or never too cold.'

T"ruly, Susan, I envy no man."

'You call it a bra. I call it excess packaging.'

'The child is very illogical'

'They don't understand goo-goo-gah-gah. Dumb it down to WHAAAAAH!'

"I said he's beginning to teethe...not tithe."

'They were hoping to gradually introduce him to the pro game, but injuries left them no choice.'

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown and Jill said 'I told you so'."

When a toddler hands you their ringing toy phone, you answer it!

"Guys, can you use your Mommy-doesn't-want-to-know-I-exist voices?"