Childcare Seeker Gifts

"I'd like to transfer to the onsite creche so I can spend more time with my child."

City Zoo: Day Care

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

In the Guru District

'Please tell me you're baby sitting?'

Mum and baby both have pacifier.

Madonna of the Pukes.

"Someone once told me that kids grow up so quickly. I hope there's some truth to that."

Children's Parties

You can't just switch them. If your wife asked you to change the baby, she probably meant the diaper.

Cry babies.

Weekday Morning Hell Bingo

"Look Mommy, hat!"

'Br'er Fox said 'I'm going to throw you into the briar patch'...And Br'er Rabbit said, 'Please,please don't taser me!''

Catching Jeffrey To Change His Diaper.

The Baby Walker

'William, I've decided to go back to work so I can get a little rest during the day.'

'OK, now let's be careful out there.'

Teacher pointing to P,Q, on board: "OK class, which letter comes next? Redbeard, you should know this."

T"ruly, Susan, I envy no man."

Fat Kid 10- Eats an ice-cream

'Don't worry. It's never too hot or never too cold.'

Interior design trends for parents....

'You call it a bra. I call it excess packaging.'

'The child is very illogical'

"I said he's beginning to teethe...not tithe."

'They don't understand goo-goo-gah-gah. Dumb it down to WHAAAAAH!'

"This is nice, but I can't help but think we forgot something."

"I'm beginning to regret taking this job at the local playgroup."

When a toddler hands you their ringing toy phone, you answer it!

"Congratulations, it's a lifetime of penury and countless sleepless nights!"

'They were hoping to gradually introduce him to the pro game, but injuries left them no choice.'

"Guys, can you use your Mommy-doesn't-want-to-know-I-exist voices?"

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown and Jill said 'I told you so'."