Childcare Provider Gifts

Housewife with her toddler hooked on the end of the mop.

'I'm on my way!'

'No provision for day care, eh?'

We're looking for someone who knows how to adapt, not adopt.

Opus Dei-care.

Janey then realized that babysitting isn't easy...

"My salary market survey reveals that the Nelsons pay two dollars an hour more than you, and their kids are much easier to babysit."

Nanny with children on leash

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

'Don't loan the shredder to Day Care again.'

"Tuesday's out - back-to-back nanny interviews. Wednesday's potty training. I can playdate Thursday. How's 3:15?"

'I'm not sure when he went missing, officer. I just noticed his TV chair is empty.'

'I don't want to worry you Fred but the babysitter we booked for tonight is two rows ahead and our kids are with her!'

Quality Time

'You the woman who advertised for a babysitter?'

Catching Jeffrey To Change His Diaper.

'Let the nanny do it!'

Rusk Assessment Form

'Thanks for the offer to baby sit him, and don't worry, he's not a fussy eater: Any dung you can find will do...'

"How long have you been a child minder?"

"Sorry, my mum asked me to babysit my brother at the last minute..."

"Trust me, with me in charge, your kid will behave and be safe..."

A Tit for Tat.

"So...what are you in for?"

"Could I change my parent number from 666?"

"This is where baby gets some alone time."

"Can you read the part about Job again?"

"They can run but they won't be able to hide."

"I told my mom either the sitter goes, or I go!"

"I'll bet she was worn out by the end of teacher's meeting day."

Working from Home

"Apparently she couldn't get a baby-sitter."

"The only way I could be sure the sitter would watch the baby, was to put it in front of the refrigerator!"

"Sorry I'm late, the crosstown is running local."

"If I leave them in there with a bottle, I can usually get a little time for myself."