Child's Dental Milestone Gifts

To help emphasize good oral hygeine inkids, Dr. Remford installed a dental floss zipline in his office.

'Are you finished eating yet, sweetie?...Guess that answers THAT question!'

'Sire, your new fortress was fine for your nephew's fifth, but I fear it is set for a sterner test.'

Fat Kid 10- Eats an ice-cream

When a toddler hands you their ringing toy phone, you answer it!

Child laughs while making farting sound under arm. Dad says, 'Isn't it nice when they find something they're good at?

'Oh Darling, you must be so proud: Your first wart!'

'At lone at last.'

'Baby's first two-step.'

"We tried 'Baby Mozart,' but he prefers 'Baby John Cage.'"

'It was the little darling's first time sitting up at the dining table!'

"Here's the baby's first birthday, her second, her third, look at her gifts..."

'Sure, I took your shovel. Ethics doesn't kick in for a year or two.'

One!

Sigh … They grow up so fast, don't they?

"You're writing a memoir? You're seven years old. Do you honestly think you can capture the interest of readers with such a short—wait, is that my name?!"

'Gee you're lucky! I don't think the Tooth-Fairy will ever bring me anything...'

'Guess who's teething?'

"Wait! I don't want to be disease resistant!"

"As it's your birthday, would you like to go in the Big Chair?"

"No, it's still just a thirst for spaghettios."

'We think he has a future in politics.'

Dominant hand reveal party

'I think you're ready for the big chair...'

"Wait, so his first whole sentence was 'I don't want to work, I just want to bang on the drum all day'?!"

"Charles, look! He’s sending his first text!"

Eagle parenting.

Sparkler

'He's my personal potty trainer.'

'His next appointment is on the 17th when the clock's little hand is on the two and the big one's on the nine.'

Here's my dental insurance card. Sorry. Twig had a visit within the last 6 months. This one's not covered. That was a check-up. This is an emergency. How about Twig's chipped tooth? Your policy doesn't cover cosmetic problems. Now I get it! My insurance is cosmetic. Have a nice day!

'Jimmy made his first blog post today.'

'There's been no stopping him since he said his first word this morning!'

"I'm too old for baby limas."

They were American tourists, visiting gay Paree...and yet this was a Mexican stand off??